Imperfectly Perfect
Children,
As I was glancing around our home today, I noticed many imperfections in our Christmas Decorating. Typically, Ian and I have everything put up, lit, matching, and it is
PERFECTION
No so with this year’s Christmas decor…
It started with the tree and running out of red ribbon…
Then the lights went our on the church of our lit up houses
Next the strand of lights within our garland died unexpectedly and now,
I noticed that we never found the missing wreath for our kitchen window….
Most certainly, 2020 has come with its challenges, one of which is that any effort toward perfection has not met with success!
And, it made me think and realize…..
I spent the greater part of my 58 ¾ years striving for perfection. I wanted to be the perfect bike rider when I was little, the perfect friend, the perfect student. I wanted to be the perfect big sister to my siblings, daughter to my parents, and mother to my children. I especially srtived to be the perfect God’s girl.
The problem is….
I was never successful, not even close
And that caused me genuine distress and grief in my life
Now I understand…..
Perfection only exists in one person and one place
Jesus and Heaven
Other than that, while we may strive for it, it will almost always be an allusive goal…
So, should that even be our pursuit?
I think not
Because we find when striving for perfection, our focus is more on how we perceive we are doing than the actual accomplishment of our goals. And, it can, and often does, take precedence and, in that precedence, life passes us by while we are standing at the window of our life waiting for the perfect timing of a goal, event, relationship
Don’t get me wrong, I wanted that 4.0 in graduate school, children who are fully strong, healthy humans, a successful business, a dog who is obedient, a husband who loves extravagantly, and all the other perfections one might desire in life
But, what I no longer do is let perfection be my guide to life satisfaction…
In therapy, my clients and I talk a lot about “progress not perfection” but I confess, I didn’t really apply that to myself
But I should, and I have started to
Striving for perfection has often paralyzed me into staying longer than I should have in things/relationships/projects
Into living in clutter when I should toss things out
Into not accomplishing my goals when I could not meet perfection
Don’t do that
Don’t strive so hard for what is not ever going to be do-able when you can find joy in the accomplishment of what is possible
Learn now to strive toward your goals with steady steps, finding delight in the journey
Learn how to be the best person you can be on a daily basis. Don’t wait to change a part of yourself until you can do it “right”
We are all works of art
Where oft times, the loveliest is the most
Perfectly imperfect 
Expose yourself to those opportunities to challenge yourself in that way
Run the mile and shoot for the goal, but be proud of the distance you make
Study to pass the exam so you are certain you did your very best rather than shoot for the 100%
Rise up to be the best nurse, pilot, social worker not because you are perfect at it but because it is your passion, and you are called to it
I think when you do this you will find that your relationships with others will grow as well. The same critique we use on ourselves in our search for perfection is typically the same judgement we use on others when they are less than
And it can make all the difference…
I am not certain of many things, but of this I am confident…
You are my imperfectly perfect children,
And I am grateful to be imperfectly perfect Mama to you,
ILYAOYMC,
Mama
